According to the Journal of Marriage and Family, common spiritual activities between a husband and wife are key ingredients to be happy or extremely happy.  What are the activities?

1. Pray together.
2. Study the Bible together.
3. Attend church together.

For those who participate in these activities, notice the difference in happiness compared to those who do not participate.

1. Whites – 83% versus 69% (14 percentage points higher)
2. Blacks – 73% versus 52% (21 percentage points higher)
3. Latinos – 78% versus 65% (13 percentage points higher)

Would you like for you and your spouse to be happier together?  I would encourage you to do the three activities listed above.  To see the article from USA Today, click on the link below.

*  Does your marriage have a prayer? – Faith & Reason.

I have been waiting on ESPN to set up our broadcast interview to announce that Suzie and I will be moving back to South Florida.  Alas, they must be allowed only one “decision” of the sort to be made this year, and LeBron James beat us to it.  So, you are finding out here.

We have enjoyed our more than a year long stint in Louisville and Chattanooga, but it’s time to go back.  Louisville is the city in which Suzie and I met.  It is home to 3 of my kids and 3 grandchildren.  It wasn’t easy leaving Louisville.  Chattanooga is a beautiful city, but it is missing what we love about South Florida.

What is that you say?

• The beaches
  • The sand
  • The waves
  • The snorkeling
  • The sunrises
  • The smell of suntan lotion
  • The fish and sea life
• The palm trees
• The year round sunshine – going to the beach in January is a real treat.
• Suzie’s son, Mikey, lives there.
• Mickey Mouse
• The multi-cultural landscape
• The waterside, outdoor restaurants with fresh mahi-mahi, grouper and key lime pie.
• Dolphins, stingrays, sharks – oh, my.
• Boats and more boats
• Riding the scooter along the coast
• First Baptist Church, West Palm Beach
• Wonderful friends
• Did I mention the beach?

We are not exactly sure where we will be or what we will be doing, but we are going.  Keep us in your prayers, and start making plans to come see us.  We will be moving in about 2 weeks.

Specific Prayer Requests:

• The right place to live
• The right job to work
• The move itelf

This past Sunday was Fathers’ Day.  Suzie and I travelled to Louisville, Kentucky to be with 3 of my kids and my 3 grandkids.  We had the opportunity of attending Sojourn Community Church East while we were in Louisville.  During the service, all fathers were recognized and given a copy of the book, Our Home is like a Little Church: Sojourn Community Church.  This is a short book written by Lindsey Blair and Bobby Giles and illustrated by Tessa Janes.  All are members of Sojourn.

The book is intended to be read by parents and children together so that they might discover God’s plan for worshipping him at home.  It is written in a poetic style with full illustration on each page.  On the left side pages, worship at church is described.  On the right side pages, worship at home is compared to the worship at church.

The basis for the book is from Deuteronomy’s instructions about teaching our children the ways of God.  It also takes a quote from Martin Luther as part of the foundation of the book’s teaching.

Abraham had in his tent a house of God and a church.  Just as today any godly and pious head of a household instructs his children…in godliness.  Therefore such a house is actually a school and church and the head of the household is a bishop and priest in his house.

–Martin Luther

Some may object to linking the church and home in this fashion, but I think it is a helpful application of the biblical teaching on the family.  The family does not supplant the church, nor should the church take the place of the home.  Each has a vital role with both similarities and distinctions.  When it comes to worship, teaching and training, both the church and the home are tools which God uses.

Others may object to the leadership role assigned to dads.  Women do play a significant role in the physical and spiritual nurture and shaping of children.  I pray that my daughter, Leah and my daughter-in-law, Amanda will continue to fulfill this role in shaping my three grandchildren.  But I do pray that they will find their husbands providing spiritual leadership for the household.  So I do pray for my son-in-law, Michael and my son, Carlton that they will be the kind of men who see their key function in life to lead their families to worship and know God.

My dearest Emma,

Two days ago you brought tremendous joy with you as you arrived into this world.  You have especially caused the hearts of your mother and father to overflow.  They love you so.  As your grandfather, I am looking forward to seeing you and holding you.

This was said of Jesus when he was a child:

And Jesus increased in wisdom and in stature and in favor with God and man. (Luke 2:52 ESV)

I pray that you will be like Jesus.  That your stature will increase from your original 6 pounds and 18.5 inches in a healthy fashion.  That you will learn how to live wisely.  Above all – that you find favor with God.  That you will love the Lord with all of your being.

Love,

Your Grandfather Frank

It is tragic when a son eschews the path that his father has prepared for him.  At least when that path is one of godliness and of following Christ.  The relationship between father and son is a sacred kinship.  My father taught me about Jesus and has lived as a Christian since I was a child.  One of my regrets is that my actions a few years ago brought pain to my father.  I also have two sons.  Both of them make me proud to be their dad.  They have been wise enough to learn from both my folly and my wisdom.  It would be painful for me if they made the same mistakes or if they rejected Jesus.

That is what has happened to one of the sharper Christian minds of the 20th century.  Francis Schaeffer was a giant among Christian thinkers when he was alive.  His writings helped shape a generation of people into thinking about a Christian Worldview.  His son, Frank, began by working with his father.  In recent years, he not only has left that work, he has become an outspoken critic of what his father taught.

Frank Schaeffer now is a book author and writer for The Huffington Post.  His last book was titled, Crazy for God: How I Grew Up as One of the Elect, Helped Found the Religious Right and Lived to Take All (or Almost All) of it Back. The title pretty well sums up the change in his life and thought.

Now I would agree that in the Christian Right, some people and some actions are just crazy.  Every group has a “crazy uncle” that has to be handled.  In many things, I would not identify with the Christian Right.  On other things, I do.  The problem with Frank Schaeffer is that he has a pretty broad definition of the Christian Right.  That is, if you believe that the Bible is true, then you are one of the crazies.

So even though I can relate to the song that goes, “Clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right” I guess to Schaeffer I will be one of the crazies.  That doesn’t mean that I buy all that everybody on the right proclaims, but I do believe that the Bible is true.  If one rejects this, with what are they left?  Here is what Schaeffer proposes:

Put fundamentalist religion in its place — in other words in the dustbin of history — and replace it with humanism, tolerant spirituality and science and we will have gone a long way to solving many other problems.

Being a religious fundamentalist of any kind should automatically disqualify a person from political office

In Schaeffer’s most recent article, he repeatedly makes disparaging comments about the Religious Right.  Here is a sample:

• Doesn’t care what is true–or even fact-based
• live life informed by self-reinforcing beliefs which are proudly non fact-based
• rooted in deep-seated resentment that can’t be cured because what is resented never actually happened.
• resist facts in particular and have a loathing of education in general
• sexual, political and social dysfunction
• hate and exclusion
• paranoid nightmare
• Religious Loony Tunes
• La La Land
• dumb religion that is the root cause of the rape of the earth and the subjugation of women
• fundamentalists share one thing in common — intolerance of others
• sanction barbarity and are fundamentally anti-democratic as well as anti-truth policies
• demand an allegiance to a “jealous God”
• fundamentalists owe allegiance (to God) over and above their country’s constitutions or the rule of law or even common decency
• no longer believes in the legitimacy of our government
• threatens violence
• American version of Iran
• Those values aren’t democratic. They aren’t patriotic. They are revolutionary and seek to impose a theocracy.

I could deal with much of this and this article would be far too long.  I will simply ask, “Who sounds like they have a tolerance problem?”

Two weeks ago the former pastor of Highview Baptist Church in Louisville passed away.  For 25 years Bill Hancock served as pastor of this church until his tenure came to a sudden end.  It ended in 1995 due to his marital infidelity.  After he left, ugly details circulated as he headed to rebuild his life in Texas.  He found a way to minister to hurting people by working for a funeral home.  The reporting of his death by the newspaper in Louisville has generated quite a bit of buzz.  Some of the comments were gracious and thankful for his positive influences in people’s lives.  Others gave evidence of having been hurt by the duplicitous life of this Christian leader.  Still others were extremely harsh towards a man who demonstrated the height of hypocrisy.

As I read through the articles and comments about this man, I thought about my own legacy — what it will be.  My story is similar to Hancock’s in many ways.  First, his fall came while serving as the pastor of a baptist church in Louisville, Kentucky.  So did mine.

Second, his fall came over a decade ago in 1995.  Mine happened two years later in 1997.  I had moved to Louisville in January of 1996 to do PhD work at The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary and was pastor of the new Trinity Baptist Church (since merged with Clifton Baptist Church).  I remember visiting Highview Baptist Church in my early days in Louisville.  This was after Hancock’s tenure.

Third, some of the same people were involved in the cleanup of both falls.  Highview was strongly connected to Southern Seminary since it was the home church for President Al Mohler.  I was a student and a teaching fellow at Southern.  I don’t know about Hancock, but I had many face to face encounters with some of the folks at Southern.

In response to the printed account and responses to Hancock’s death, I am left with a number of things that I know and some things that I question.  Here are some of my thoughts:

1.  I am extremely grateful for those who have demonstrated grace and forgiveness to me.  It is obvious that Hancock had many who treated him the same way.  Some of these people will never know (this side of heaven) what that grace has meant to me.  Last week I received a phone call from one of these guys.  He was merely checking to see how I am doing and to chat.  I hung up the phone with a surge of gratitude to God for such a friend.

2.  I understand those who have a hard time expressing that kind of grace.  I cannot demand nor expect them to wipe the slate clean.  In fact, I have never understood those who so egregiously violate trust and expect others to forgive when an apology is offered.  If it is expected and can be demanded, then it is not grace.  Hancock nor I deserve to be forgiven and to have grace extended to us.  The problem is not with the response of people.  The problem was in our betrayal of our pastoral fidelity.

3.  I know that the consequences for this kind of sin will always exist, even if we leave this world.  Our actions have tarnished our name and the name of our God.  God can handle the defense of his name because of his holiness.  I have no defense.

4.  I know that the consequences are not limited to the individual sinner.  My family, in particular, was deeply wounded by my actions.  Several people expressed sorrow for Hancock’s family for having to read about this one segment in the life of their kin.  Unfortunately, that’s part of the deal.  My children will always have a father who failed to demonstrate godly love towards their mother.  They will continue to have to split holidays and special occasions.

5.  I am a bit envious that Hancock found a way to minister to hurting people.  I try to do the same in my writings and personal interactions with people.  My path has taken me into the business world.  I hope that I have had a godly influence on those with whom I have encountered.  Too often I have failed at that, too.

6.  I also have realized afresh that the sin of adultery did not negate the genuine heart-felt love and ministry to those before the fall.  One writer indicated that his own marriage has been solid and wonderful as a result of the teaching and advice received from Hancock prior to his/her wedding day.  I have heard from many of those among whom I had lived and ministered that have benefited spiritually from my pastoral leadership.

7.  I hope that those who are currently in pastoral ministry or preparing for the ministry will learn from those of us who have fallen.  It wasn’t worth it.  Period.

8.  I long to stand before my Lord and fall before the one who gave his life for my sin.  Hancock has now experienced that.

A few weeks ago, I opened up an email late at night while laying in my bed.  It was from somebody very dear to me.  It was a message of grace and love.  It expressed admiration for growing through this horrendous time of life and demonstrating a better love to those around me.  The message left me unable to speak with tears flowing down my cheeks.  Any struggles, as painful as they have been, pale in comparison to this amazing demonstration of grace.

I pray that I will continue to grow, be gracious and loving.  I pray that when I die, my legacy will be more than the stupidity of my actions in 1997.

I thought I’d take a chance

My first words were no mystery

“Excuse me, would you like to dance?”

The rest, they say, is history

You became Mrs. Gantz

]]> http://www.pulpit2pew.com/1633/valentines-day-poem-suzie/feed/ 0 http://www.pulpit2pew.com/1628/a-new-granddaughter-is-on-the-way/ http://www.pulpit2pew.com/1628/a-new-granddaughter-is-on-the-way/#comments Sat, 13 Feb 2010 13:29:37 +0000 Frank Gantz http://www.pulpit2pew.com/?p=1628

Carlton and Amanda Gantz are preparing for the arrival of their first child in June. Looks like the baby will be a girl. Carlton is my son. The baby will be my first granddaughter. I have so loved my 2 grandsons (Leah’s boys). A little girl will be nice. Sugar and spice and everything nice. That’s what little girls are made of.

Carlton called me to tell me the news of the gender. Later they broke the news to the rest of the family with this prop.

On January 11, 1960 I entered the world in Albuquerque, New Mexico.  50 years later, I look back grateful for so much in my life.  I certainly wish that I could replay some of the events in my life.  Hopefully the gray hairs on my head and on my beard indicate that I have gained some wisdom since my youth.  I am wise enough to realize that I am a blessed man.  Here is a list of 50 blessings to match the 50 years.  Many more exist than 50, but this is a good reminder for things I am thankful.

1. At the top of the list is that I have an amazing God.  As a youngster, the Spirit of God gave life to me through Jesus.  This has made all of the difference in the world.
2. I had the privilege of being a shepherd to God’s people and preaching the Bible for about 20 years.  I still miss this, but am grateful that I had that much time to do this.
3. God took a sinful, broken vessel of a man who had sinned grossly against him, his wife, his family, his church and loved him still.  I will forever be amazed at this display of grace.
4. Suzie – she has been such a strength to me.  I love her dearly and know that she loves me.
5. Cameron – my firstborn.  He can be intense and impatient, but has made his father proud so many times.
6. Leah – my second born.  Leah has never met a stranger.  Her love for life has always brought a smile to my face.
7. Carlton – my third born.  He has been the overachiever of the bunch…at football, work and marriage.
8. Bethany – my youngest.  Bethany didn’t get the best from her father, but still manages to brighten his day with her love.
9. Heath – my oldest grandchild.  As a 7 year old, we enjoy chatting, wrestling and being together.
10. Caleb – my second grandchild.  This 3 year old is a character.  So much fun listening to him.
11. Children-in-law.  Michael (married to Leah) and Amanda (married to Carlton) are tremendous partners to my kids and a delight to this father-in-law.
12. My parents.  Eugene and Lillie have always been my biggest fans.  A son couldn’t have parents with greater love than have I.
13. The opportunity to play competitive football, baseball and basketball.  I really enjoyed playing quarterback for the Sapulpa Chieftains in Oklahoma.
14. The opportunity to coach my boys in 3 sports.  I know it wasn’t easy having your dad as a coach, but they both handled it very well.
15. The wonderful people in the churches that I pastored.  They took great care of me and my family.
16. The teachers and professors who taught me to think and prepared me well.
17. My friends – I’ve lived life as a nomad being a military kid and throughout.  Some wonderful people have kept in touch through the years and the moves.
18. I’ve had the privilege to travel throughout the world.  Outside of the US, I have been to Okinawa, Italy, Germany, Israel, Russia, Switzerland and Guatemala with short stops in several other places.
19. Taking Suzie to Disney World…several times.  I love seeing her childlike joy there.
20. Living at City Place in West Palm Beach.
21. Relaxing in the sun at the beach.
22. 2 weeks in Hawaii with Suzie.
23. Seeing some great college football games live including a national championship game.
24. Working in some great hotels and for some great hoteliers.
25. Spending several years at the amazing Brown Hotel in Louisville.
26. Being a fan of the Oklahoma Sooners and the Dallas Cowboys.
27. 2 great pastors in Daniel Montgomery and Jimmy Scroggins.
28. Spending a day and a night with Suzie with nothing to do.
29. Teaching pastors in Russia.
30. Skipping class at OBU to play ping-pong with Todd Littleton.
31. Riding back and forth to Mid-America Baptist Theological Seminary with Dale Perry.
32. Playing golf with Cameron and Carlton.
33. Having the grandchildren spend the night with Suzie and me.
34. Watching Mom and Dad celebrate 50 years of marriage with family and friends.
35. Listening to Cameron playing saxophone, Leah singing, Carlton playing trumpet and Bethany playing violin.  Sadly no instruments are currently being played.
36. Finding junk with Suzie at thrift shops, garage sales and auctions.
37. Riding the scooter along the beach with Suzie on the back.
38. Meeting interesting people (some famous) throughout my hotel career.
39. Learning that some of my blog writings have had a positive influence on others.
40. Co-workers – I have had many great ones with whom I have spent long days together.
41. Playing flag football with my kids.
42. Getaway weekends with Suzie on some amazing outings.
43. Watching Cameron play basketball in the AAU national championships in Utah.
44. Watching Carlton play in a state championship football game.
45. Watching my 2 daughters come into this world.  The hospitals wouldn’t allow me in when the boys were born.
46. Getting married to Suzie in the hills of Gatlinburg, Tennessee.
47. Spending 3 weeks studying in Israel in 1981.
48. Enjoying some wonderful dining experiences around the world.
49. Discovering the world underneath the ocean by snorkeling.
50. Spending a day with Suzie, all of the kids, the kids-in-law and grandkids and watching all of the joyful interactions.